Archive | April, 2015

New Best “Friend”

18 Apr

“Real friends get treated like family.”

Yesterday I got an invitation to become “friends” with Uncle Kevin.  And even though this gentleman isn’t actually my uncle, Uncle Kevin is the only name I’ve ever known him by .  He’s actually the uncle of my son’s daughters because he’s the brother of my son’s ex-wife.

And even though I never remember actually meeting Uncle Kevin I feel as if I know him.  It’s always Uncle Kevin this and Uncle Kevin that.  He seemed to be an important part of his niece’s lives.  Uncle Kevin could always be counted on.

And even though my son’s divorce was less than amicable, perhaps I shouldn’t hold this against Uncle Kevin.  And because of Uncle Kevin’s unusual circumstances, his Facebook posts will probably be more interesting than the posts I’m used to reading.  You see, Uncle Kevin died about a year ago.  But I guess beggars can’t be choosers.  And I guess a person needs all the friends they can get.  Thanks for wanting to friend me, Uncle Kevin!

Loveya – The Grandma

I See

7 Apr

“I was walking down the street wearing glasses when the prescription ran out.”  Steven Wright

This is a true story.  Which sounds contradictory.  We make up stories, so how can they be true.  Think about that some night when you’re unable to sleep.  

My husband told me that he’s very concerned about his vision.  He said that when he works at night (he drives semi) he sometimes has a difficult time seeing clearly.  We then discussed the last time he had an eye exam, or as I like to phrase it, had his head examined.

He said it was about two years ago but he didn’t like the eye doctor so he never had the prescription filled.  He said the doctor told him that he had the beginning of cataracts (my husband, not the doctor) but they were slight and nothing to worry about.  My husband loves to worry.  The doctor lost points.  The prescription went unfilled.

Then my husband mentioned that he doesn’t wear his current glasses when he drives at night because it’s more convenient to keep an old pair of glasses right there in his truck.  His old pair of glasses is two or three prescriptions old.  (A moment of silence to absorb the intricacies of this thought pattern and all its implications.)   I began to chortle.  I lost more points than the doctor.

glassesHere is a photo of my glasses.  It’s a very difficult picture to take because I had to take my glasses off in order to take the picture.  With my glasses off it was difficult to see exactly what I was aiming at.  My husband would understand.

Loveya – The Grandma


Come Follow Me

2 Apr

“The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing.  If you can fake that, you’ve got it made.”  Groucho Marx

crop circles

Alien Porch Circles

The above is a picture of Alien Porch Circles, a recent phenomena in my yard.  They occur every time I spend a day doing a massive amount of cooking.  I think it’s the aroma of food that wafts up into space and lures the aliens to earth.  Just kidding!

Actually the circles occur when I do a massive amount of cooking because I don’t have a large enough fridge to hold all the pots so I set them outside in a snowbank to cool before I divide the soup or stew into smaller plastic containers for the freezer.  I’m not just a pretty face!

And I could not, in good conscience, perpetuate such a bending of the truth without eventually coming clean.  Not even on April first, which you’ll notice I missed.  But by only one day.

Which brings up another question.  I supposedly have over 70 followers to my blog.  Mysteriously, I generally don’t have any visitors to my blog, which is OK.  I’m doing this blog in order to have a giggle, share recipes, or to rant about something trivial.  This keeps the rants out of the ears of my family and friends.  We all know how much we love listening to people rant!

I wonder, however, why I get notices of people who think one of my posts was pretty awesome and maybe I should go and see what they’re up to!  This, sometimes, gets me to go look at their blog and voila, they have a visitor.  Meanwhile, I sit all alone by the telephone…  Oh, wait.  That was a lament from my younger days.  Actually, I’ll be in my art studio playing with paint.  And I might visit your blog if I see that you truly visited mine. Integrity, people!

Loveya – The Grandma

Grandmother of the Bride

1 Apr

“Keep calm and be a queen.”  Anon



Flowers.  Happy Spring!

My granddaughter is getting married in about 8 weeks.  My son in about 6 weeks.  I get to buy some new outfits, tra la la!

Not too concerned about my son’s wedding.  He’s old enough to make his own mistakes decisions and I’m already gray.  Anyway, when I got married for the third time I stopped giving marital advice.  

But my granddaughter’s wedding is another story.  In spite of the fact that this dear, beautiful, young woman could seldom be coaxed into a dress, her wedding has become an event of details.  I’m not privy to all the details but there’s one detail that applies to me.  My son, her father, (not the son getting married) called to say hi mom. how are you, how’s your current husband, and could you make sure that you wear either navy blue or charcoal gray to the wedding.  He kind of snuck that color thing in at the end.


 Teapot.  Not navy blue

What concerns me is the lack of choices.  I’m a woman who likes choices.  So why couldn’t she choose a color that would look tacky on the step-grandmother?  That red head is going to look stunning.  While I, the grandmother unstepped, look best in magenta or lime green covered with glitter.  

There was, however, a reason given for this request.  The bridal colors are going to be green and yellow (Go Pack!) and photographs of the auspicious occasion will look best if the grandmothers are in colors that don’t clash or stand out too much.  

My first shopping trip led to a dead end.  Too much stiff fabric with stiff lace.  My second shopping trip was to a dress shop that believed in the feminine.  They didn’t have anything suitable for the wedding but they did have three other items that I couldn’t resist.  One of them is actually navy blue, but too casual for wedding wear.


Navy blue but too casual

It does give new meaning to cuteness, don’t you think?  With a pair of white leggings, on the slightly baggy side…  We grandmas have still got it!

About the pictures in my generally picture-less blog .  There’s some unwritten, and possibly written, rule about having pictures in a blog.  No, the pictures have little to do with the actual blog except for the last one.  Kind of like the rule about wearing navy blue or charcoal gray?  It might make things visually more interesting but there’s probably more important content issues when it comes to getting married.  You think?

Loveya – The Grandma